Portrait of Playwright Nick Jones, 2011
Malmaison, residence of the late Roger Prigent (1923-2012)
Peter Sumner Walton Bellamy©2014
Photograph taken with Hasselblad film camera.Film hand-developed by photographer
By Nick Jones
...all the exciting jobs go to the young ones. Plus, they prefer to work with chimps before their genitals become engorged.
TREVOR. I know I know. Then how do you do it then? How do you stay relevant after puberty? I mean, you still have a great career. I see all the costumes you get to wear.
OLIVER. Truthfully, it takes everything I got. To behave. at this age. But you’ve got to behave. you’ve got to.
TREVOR. I know. Sometimes I...I do things I’m not proud of. I knocked a cup over.
OLIVER. You shouldn’t knock cups over. you’ll never get ahead that way. You have to fight those urges.
TREVOR. It just seemed fun.
OLIVER. Of course it’s fun. you think I don’t know it’s fun? you think most days I wouldn’t rather just be going berserk, smashing watermelons and hurling clods of my own feces? Oh my god what a release that would be. But you’ll never get work that way. I knew a guy, worked in the Barnum Circus all-chimp production of Hamlet, started beating his trainer with a prop skull. you won’t be seeing him on stage again. People don’t understand that kind of humor. you’ve got to be able to sit still, and follow instructions.
TREVOR. I try. Sometimes I don’t understand the instructions.
OLIVER. Well if you can’t understand instructions, then just sit still and bear your gums so it looks like you’re smiling. Believe me, if you can just do that—if you can just behave—the world will open for you.